5 Ways to Protect your Energy

energy
Photo by Eternal Happiness on Pexels.com

How often do you feel that your energy is low or completely depleted? Many people spend time getting swept away by the energy of others; spending time to make others happy, or putting unreciprocated effort in to friendships/relationships — all to eventually have their energy sucked away.

Being an empath and a highly agreeable person can cause for this sort of feeling. Having these traits can cause one to want to please and care for others more than what is reciprocated. Being highly agreeable, means that you are more likely to go with what others want and not really give an opinion of your own. When someone asks what you want for dinner, a person who is highly agreeable would most likely respond with “whatever you want is good with me”.

Being high in the trait of agreeableness has its pros and cons. However, in the regard of preserving ones energy, people who are highly agreeable are more likely to have their energy depleted quickly. People who are agreeable tend to have great difficulty saying “no” and are more likely to “go with the flow” rather than to put their foot down when they really should.

When efforts are constantly unreciprocated, we tend to feel drained. This can lead to greater feelings of sadness, anxiety, depression, and intense feelings of worthlessness.

Going in to the new year, it is time to protect your energy; because if you don’t, then no one else will!

5 Ways to protect your energy:

1. Try to be Less Agreeable

The next time someone asks you what you want for dinner, really think about it and choose what you want! Don’t always hide behind what others want and agree to go along with it. By speaking up about what you want, and saying “no” more often, you are preserving your own energy and only spending it on what you truly want. Learning how to draw the line with some people is very important as one cannot always be understanding and ignore their own needs.

2. Set Intentions

I have recently really gotten in to setting intentions for myself each week to follow and hold myself accountable for. Set an intention that you are going to protect your energy. Write it down or have this intention on your phone as a reminder to follow everyday. An example of this can be: “I intend to protect my energy and respond to others from a place of peace and power” or, “I intend to protect my energy by putting my own needs first”.

3. Trust yourself

Trust your own energy and power. Trust that you can make your own decisions, and put effort in to people/things that are worth it to you. Trust that you will spend time putting your energy in to people/things that will reciprocate your efforts. Trust that you will put energy in to your own growth and wellness before the wellness of others. By trusting yourself you are protecting yourself from feeling drained and depleted.

4. Reflect

Genuinely reflect on where your energy goes. Here are some prompts to help guide your self-reflection: How much time and effort do you spend trying to please others? How often are you understanding towards the needs of others whilst your own needs are ignored? How often are you reaching out to connect with someone when it is unreciprocated?

By reflecting on where your energy goes, you can identify certain behaviours and actions you take that should probably be protected instead.

5. Replenish your own Energy

Replenish your own energy! Take some time to indulge in self-love. At the end of the day, you are always going to be the one who is responsible to take care of and love yourself! Feelings of sadness and worthlessness because someone else wont reciprocate your efforts can only be rid by you! So take some time to do some self healing and remind yourself that you are worthy and deserve to protect your energy instead.

As we prepare for a new year, I realize it is imperative to protect my own energy, as sometimes it is easy to get drowned out by others. It is time to draw some boundaries and set limits on how agreeable we may be. By making our own thoughtful choices and understanding our own needs first we can maintain a certain level of powerful, peaceful energy. If you find that there are people in your life who don’t reciprocate your efforts, it is time for some change! Happy New Year, 2022!

Check out my previous post!

Living for Yourself

silhouette of man standing beside ocean during sunset
Photo by Ali Naderi on Pexels.com

When was the last time you made a decision by yourself and for yourself? I can answer that honestly and say that I really can’t remember the last time I was able to fully do that. It’s been extremely difficult for me to live just for myself as I am constantly haunted by the thoughts of my decisions impacting others. Some would say that is selfless and it is empathetic to consider others when living out one’s own life.

But I say by doing that I am no longer living for myself. Instead, I am cautiously making decisions to please others and am sacrificing my own being.

A common example is of the student who graduates from high-school and is then pressured by their parents to obtain further education in a degree that they have no interest in. How can this student be successful in completing a degree in something they didn’t choose?

The reality is that we cannot please everyone and if we are going to spend time trying to please someone it should be ourselves. It’s easy to get lost in the shadows of others and seek acceptance when making decisions. This is an essential psychological need as outlined by Maslow’s hierarchy of needs (belongingness and love needs).

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Photo from Pinterest

Abraham Maslow, a famous American Psychologist said that humans cannot reach self-actualization (achieve one’s potential) unless all their basic needs as outlined above are met. So basically, humans naturally seek acceptance and belongingness in order to advance to feelings of prestige and accomplishment to eventually reach self-actualization.

How Can I Start Living for Myself?

body of water during golden hour
Photo by Sebastian Voortman on Pexels.com

It’s about time you asked!

Who am I?

  • First, you must figure out who you are and what you want. This tends to be the most difficult step.
  • Do you want to be an artist, a musician, an athlete, an engineer? Do you want to graduate university, write a book, run a marathon?
  • Or, maybe you just want to start taking more time to yourself and not feel guilty for doing so.

Self-Care

  • Taking care of yourself is the absolute best thing you can do!
  • Fulfilling your own needs in order to satisfy your happiness can be the most difficult step to take but I assure you that it’s worth it.

Planning

  • Next, you must brainstorm the steps needed to pursue your goals without worrying how it will impact those around you.
  • Remove and detatch yourself from others.
  • Focus on your own goals that are separate from others and how you can achieve them without seeking their approval.
  • What kind of standards must you set so that you can look back and think that you lived a life with few/no regrets.

Accept Change

  • Accept the change that comes with this new journey you are embarking on.
  • Since you will now be focusing mainly on yourself focus on adapting to a new mindset.

Be You!

  • Be yourself! Choose what it is that you want to do and make sure you are doing it for yourself.
  • If you feel the need to seek acceptance or approval then you’re probably doing it wrong and need to start over.

By following this process your happiness will flourish two-fold and you will begin to live for yourself. Although this post is about living for yourself, you will see that once you do, those who love you will be happy for you and their approval (although not necessary) will come naturally, as your success becomes the success of your family and closest friends too.

Be proud of the life you are living and begin to live for yourself & not others! Happy Friday!

Comment down below any thoughts or feedback! Make sure to share this post with your friends and family.